The Species Called 'Parlekar'

Note : The following post is in a mixture of Languages - English and Minglish (that is, Marathi written in English alphabets) because that is the language of the place about which this article is written.

Pu. La. Deshpande hyancha famous essay “tumhala kon vhaychay – mumbaikar punekar ki nagpurkar?” hyaat survatilach ek vaakya aahe - “Tashi Maharashtrat shekdo gaava aahet. Pan jyanchya pudhe kar jodave ashi fakta teen-ch khaas sthala – Pune, Nagpur aani Mumbai” Pan hyach barobar, Maharashtrat ajun ek gaav aahe je hya list madhe place of honour deserve karta aani te mhanje Parla. By “Parla” I meant Vile Parle east.

Describing the Parlekar species of humans is a mammoth task in itself. It would be easier to understand them if you have some idea of their elder cousins – the Punekars; because Parla is Mumbai’s mini-Pune. Their very own newsletter called ‘Aamhi Parlekar’ states the following –

“Friends, Surfers and Parlekars,

Vile Parle, a suburb of some of the most progressive societies in western India. But to some it is still a small village in the heart of Mumbai, just Parle! Home to industrialists, litterateurs, social reformers and artistes; a classy-funky mix, like no other on the map of modern Mumbai. Parlekars share an exciting relationship that bridges commerce and culture, technology and tradition. 'Aamhi Parlekar' or to put it in the millennium jargon - We Parleites!, the community newsletter, has been aiming at binding every household for growth beyond language, caste and socio-economic background. We have emmerged as a powerful media for social interaction and constructive communication. Understanding the need of society, we encourage all Parlekars to stand together by a good cause.”

Parlyaatlya lokanna aapan Parlekar asnyacha “jaajvalya abhimaan” asto; samanya Mumbaikarachya bhaashet – maaz. Maaz paishyacha nahi, bara ka! Parlyaat bharpur shrimanti aahe he khara but they’ll never show it off. All over the country, your status mat be equalled to the number of cars you own but in case of Parlekars, it depends on your child’s academic or extra-curricular performances. An average Parlekar parent has more knowledge about the lessons in their child’s school textbook than many school teachers. Again, there is also a special case of Parlekar parent wherein the mother, along with keeping a tab on their own child’s progress, has a diary maintaining the examination marks of their ward’s classmates too!

Parla ek “gaav” aahe asa mhanayla harkat nahi; kaaran parylachya kontyahi eka toka-pasun diameter chya dusyra tokala minimum fare madhe pochta yeta (including the super-fast meters of some rickshaws)! Speaking of rickshaws, let me introduce you to the Parlekar rickshaw-walas. There are an eternally laid back species whose only aim in life is to drive as fewer passengers as possible and to show as arrogant face expressions as possible to those passengers who dare ask them to cross the threshold of Parla, even to adjacent places like Andheri and Santa Cruz! They are born to serve and cater to the needs of the ever lazy Parlekars who need a rick just to communicate from Subhash road to Hanuman Road! Heaven help all of them! Tumhi Pu.La.Deshpande hyanchya “Asaami Asaami” madhla ‘Parlyachi Mavshi’ vaachla aselach. Non-Parlekars cha parlyaat pahilyandi asaach gondhal hota. ‘Coz Parla is a maze of infinite lanes and by-lanes. But if you’ve been brought up in Parla, then there are very few Parlekars who do not fancy an evening stroll along these roads.

It is commonly joked that all roads in Parla be covered with zebra-crossing stripes coz, according to Parlekars, the roads are the sole birth-right of pedestrians and that they are obliging vehicle owners by allowing them to use the roads. Parlyaat footpath varun chalna, rastyachya kadene vagaire chalna he mhanje agdi ghaanpana cha lakshan; rasta ha gadyaan-sathi banavlela nasun tyachya barobbar madhun agdi gappaa maarat maarat chalnya sathi banavlela aahe asa Parlekarancha thaam matt aahe. Car-owners are required to honk and wait till the group of ladies standing bang in middle of the road, holding their extremely important gossip conversations, notice the horns and then oblige the driver a great deal by moving aside. (Those ladies wont forget to give the vehicle owner scathing looks and the less blessed drivers are even able to hear things like “kay mele rastyachya agdi madhun gaadya chalavtat!) An RTO test might give you the licence to drive but one is considered to have truly learnt the art of driving when you’ve successfully navigated the Parla Market road!

Parla is well-known for its cultural society. It has its own “Parle Mohatsav” and the famous Tilak Mandir hosts the “Grahak Peth”, “Khadya Melava”, “Majestic Gappa” etc; events that make a Parlekar proud. Another thing which makes Parlekars hold their heads high is its strong education system. Parla boasts of the very famous Parle Tilak Vidyalaya (PTV); a school known all over for producing scholars and great people like Pu.La.Deshpande. The Parlekar kids are eternally divided into 2 categories – PTVians and non-PTVians. Non-PTVians then generally are the MBHS crowd. The school badge states that MBHS stands for Madhavrao Bhagwat High School. But there are other forms which are more commonly used for them by PTVians, for example - Manda Buddhi High School. If you wish to know more about the Parlekar students and their further division into PTV and MBHS crowd, it would help if you’re a viewer of the famous Marathi daily soap – Asambhav. Adinath Shastri would be a true MBHS guy who personifies the idiom “empty vessels make more noise”. While Priya Shastri is, without a doubt, a PTVian; bhayankar aagauu aani nako titka superiority complex.

But Parlekars are a species to be respected. If you remember, a couple of years back, there had been a lot of news in the papers about the SSC board exams wherein full marks were awarded to all students for a particular question in the maths paper. It had so happened that one set out of the 4 sets for the maths paper was a bit difficult than the rest. It were none other than the Parlekar parents who had marched up to the education minister and compelled the board to award full marks to everyone to avoid injustice. Infact, even in case of the recent 90:10 SSC quota debate which is grabbing headlines, it is the Parlekars’ fight to make sure that SSC students do not suffer. Sooner or later, you’ll respect these people. Aaho, senior citizenschi duparchi zopmod hote mhanun chakka vimaanacha route badlun ghetla Parlekaranni mhanje bagha! Great aahet te; kimbahuna dusra kahi shabdach nahiye!

The term “Parlekars” is not just confined to Homo sapiens alone. There are also species of Parlekar dogs, Parlekar cows and Parlekar crows amongst others. Parlekar dogs bark at anyone and anything altogether. Like all other dogs, they bark when they see a cat, or when they see a man running, and when they loose their heads, they chase cars like many other dogs do too. But, as a Parlekar speciality, they’ll bark when they see someone walking peacefully just to watch the fun when he gets scared, or they’ll bark to wake every other dog in locality and create a racket drawing people up their walls, and they’ll bark when they’re bored in the afternoon, and they’ll bark just to show that they can bark!

Parla hi jaga khup niarali aahe; te jag veglach aahe. Yes, they are a lot who are so excessively proud that they’ve their own cable channel called “Parlekar channel”. But again, they are those who’ll make sure that their future generations profit and they’ll take steps in that direction. Parlekaranna maaz aahe he khara, pan kuthetari to maaz justified aahe. Through this essay, I’ve tried to give you a primary introduction to the species called Parlekars pan Parlyacha anubhav ghetlyashivay Parlekaranchi dhamaal purnapane kalnaar nahi. But at the end of it, I can say only one thing- tumhi jar Parlyaat rahnaare asaal tar Parlekar honya-sarkhi majja nahi he Parlyaat jaglyavarach kalu shakel!